ThisTakesTooLongToType

The Saints marched in with this list…

• Aries – You’re going to get heart burn if you eat that.
• Taurus – Stop weezing the compressed air, it’s just compressed air.
• Gemini – Your evil twin has a better alibi than you today.
• Cancer – Myspacers think you waste too much time surfing the Internet.
• Leo – You need to go by Staples and pick up some paper for the printer today.
• Virgo – Your brother has a crush on you today.
• Libra – Stop wasting your life. We don’t need any more lawyers!
• Scorpio – I know what you’re thinking and you should be ashamed of yourself.
• Sagittarius – When you leave the house, you are going to forget something. You will come back for it and then leave again.
• Capricorn – You will think you recognize somebody today but then you will realize that it’s somebody else.
• Aquarius – You are going to eat today.
• Pisces – Try not to hang-glide from the roof today.